HAVE YOU EVER LOST TRUST IN GOD? by Elodie Quetant for Core Christianity
I once did. It felt like a balloon in my chest quickly deflated. As I ransacked my mind for Scripture to keep me hopeful, my faith’s air level neared zero, and then it was too late—my heart decided to blame God. I never experienced this before. Even when life served its worst circumstances, I had faith that God saw and heard me.
Not this time. I have often heard of others who reached this pit, and I somehow knew I would not go unscathed the day disbelief came for me. But my faith in God’s care didn’t drain away in the ruins of one of my jovial dreams like I always thought it would. No. It chose to leave me on a winter night as I watched my mother mentally calculate how much time she had before her car would be repossessed. And like a mother who tries to grab her toddler before they run off, I grasped at the last strands of my faith and mustered an encouragement. “Things will be okay, mom; just pray.” I half-believed that prayer would help, and I reasoned it would be easier to survive my own distrust than survive my mother’s.
Being raised by a single parent has its challenges. It is often characterized by lack: lack of food, lack of clothes. And this was just another instance of not having enough. It wasn’t until I took a walk that I remembered the words of my precious Lord: “Do not be anxious about your life” (Matthew 6 v 25). The reminder was a balm to an ache. Verses 31-32 came to my rescue next: “Do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ … Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” I was reminded that God indeed sees me and all my needs: this word comforted me, and it fueled my faith for months.
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His Firm Grip
I recall this time in my life when I read the psalmist’s words in Psalm 119 v 49: Remember your word to your servant, in which you have made me hope. David’s steadfast hope was in what God assured him of. Because God himself did the promising, David could boldly proclaim, You said it, Lord. Now remember me. If God said it, then it is a sure thing. In the times when we feel invisible, we can counter those fickle feelings that tell us we don’t matter with the truth that God will never leave us or forsake us (Hebrews 13 v 5). When the disappointments of life weigh us down, we can remember that God is the lifter of our heads (Psalm 3 v 3). When we feel like we are doing life alone, we can know that it is God who helps us (Isaiah 41 v 10). God also gives us hope in his word. He knows he can be counted on, and he kindly fastens our hearts to his promises.
