A TIME TO MOURN by Mary York for Core Christianity
“I know that God has a plan for this,” I said, holding back my tears because Zoom calls don’t mask waterworks as well as old-fashioned phone calls. “I know he’s sufficient and that he has promised peace and grace….”
I was saying it more to myself than to my friend. She interrupted me gently.
“These are all true things, Mary, but it’s OK to feel the pain of your loss as well.”
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Her words rolled across me like thunder, reverberating deeply across a dry soul that desperately needed to feel the sweetness of rain.
Some seasons are hard to live through. No one explains in children’s Sunday school how hard the Christian life is. No matter how securely you fasten yourself with the full armor of God, there will be trials.
Some of these will be run-of-the-mill struggles—disappointments at work or school, strained relationships, rejection and change, and long days that start with not enough sleep and end with a flat tire on the side of the road or a burned dinner.
Other trials will feel life-shaking. In a world that is sin-cursed, is it any surprise that heartbreak is real?
Marriages are ripped apart by sin. Sickness besets us and those we love, sometimes leaving us permanently encumbered. Friends die young. Our families grieve, and hurt ripples out like an unstoppable wave. Hopes for companionship and family seem not to grow, no matter how much we water them with prayer. Infertility. Infidelity. The shackles of our sinful flesh. We watch our friends and family leave the faith, or we feel ourselves drifting away. We watch the shadows of doubt and fear and disbelief close around us. We become unwelcome companions of loneliness, weariness, and the undefinable ache of a longing heart.
This pain is real.
Job’s words have felt so true for me this year: “My eyes have grown dim with grief; my whole frame is but a shadow” (Job 17:7).
