WHAT IS THE SINGLE GREATEST GIFT? Laurel Goodwin for Core Christianity
My first and only marriage proposal took place at the chow hall on a naval base in Yokosuka, Japan. It was prefaced with, “Do you want to make some money?” and pitched as a sure-fire way to finally move out of the barracks. I said no, but I admit I considered the offer for longer than I should have. Lest you doubt the practicality of this piece, to those of you who live in the barracks I’d like to say: You have options.
I have read many an article concerning singleness. It’s a gift because of all that free time just waiting to be filled! Think of all the good things you can do since you’re all by yourself! Or, it’s a curse because of all that free time that’s just waiting to be filled. And let’s not forget all the good things you are supposed to do since you are, after all, by yourself.
Oftentimes it’s our married friends who are singing the praises of this life stage we seem to be stuck in. This isn’t without justification; the reality is, I have more free time to do what I want than my married friends. Yet just as often it seems that our fellow singles are writing laments about our current state. There is truth in this as well. I speak from experience when I say that it’s a hard thing to go home to an empty apartment night after night. It’s not easy to attend a baby shower or a Bible study and realize you’re the only one that’s single. What has been declared “good” for everyone else is, somehow, not good for you.
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With that said, I want this article to take a different approach. The reality is, if we believe that God is good, we must believe that any Christian who is single is so because it’s what’s good for them. “No good thing does God withhold from those who walk uprightly,” the psalmist sang (Ps. 84:11). And because of Christ’s propitiation for my sins, my walk is upright in the sight of God (Rom. 8:1–5). The everyday goodness of God does not waiver from that Good Friday when he set before Christ the cup of wrath that should have been mine. He doesn’t change, despite what we might be tempted to believe (James 1:17).
Make no mistake, there are certainly days when I wish that the Lord would give me a different good. After all, didn’t God himself say that it’s not good for man to be alone (Gen. 2:18)? But for Christians, there’s a twofold answer for this question. First is the spiritual reality: We know that Christ has declared that he is with us always (Matt. 28:20). We know that the Holy Spirit, described by Christ as our Helper (John 16:7), is with us and intercedes for us (Rom. 8:26).