HOW TO LIVE THE LIFE YOU NEVER WANTED Laurel Goodwin for Core Christianity
How do you live a life where you never get the education you dreamed of, or where the right man never comes along, or where your child is always the prodigal, or where there is no child at all? Or what about when your marriage is always difficult, there’s never quite enough money to be comfortable, that friend never comes back into your life, or the sickness finally takes over?
The world is a cruel place. We do have the bedrock assurance that Christ will come back for what is his (Heb 9:28). And while that gives us hope to endure, in the time being we have to contend with life in this world and the troubles we’ve been told to expect (John 16:33).
This list is neither exhaustive nor universal, but here are the things that have helped me the most when I’ve felt less than blessed:
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1. Pray
When we’re confronted with what will never be, it’s tempting to avoid prayer or give it up all together. Why bother? we think. If God is not listening, why am I speaking? If the ceiling is as far as my prayers go, why send them out to begin with?
I understand what it’s like to feel as if prayer is the exercise of talking to yourself. But friend, our feelings are not reality. We can feel that prayer is an exercise in futility, but we know from Scripture that it isn’t. Christ himself took the time to tell us how to pray—in a format that’s remarkably easy to remember and applicable to every circumstance (Matt. 6:5-15). Our finite feelings don’t fence in God’s will or his actions.
We can also feel that our desires are so sacred that they will and must happen. But this isn’t necessarily so. God isn’t limited to our desires for our lives. We’re weak and don’t know what we should pray for (Rom. 8:26) but the Holy Spirit—who Christ called our helper (John 16:7)—intercedes for us according to God’s will for our lives. We can trust that God’s will is good and perfect.
2. Trust
We’re not eternal. I have an idea of what my future could be based on what I’d like to do, the experiences I’ve had, and the interests I’ve cultivated. I can build the frame of what I hope will be, but that’s all it is—it’s just a frame. I’m not writing this to discourage you, but to underscore that our finite natures require us to trust in our infinite Father who knows all things (Ps. 147:5).
